Hendryk was born in Bedford in 1969 to Polish parents. It took him 20 years to leave, with one O level tied up in a handkerchief at the end of a long stick. He lost both parents on the way, though not through carelessness. After a lengthy stay in academia, Bangor and Morecambe, he settled in Lancaster, where he fell in love, fell out of love, worked up debts, and worked in insurance.

Rumour has it he’s related to Joseph Conrad. He’s not denying it.